i am about to make quite a big decision. something that i should put full of concern. some advises and information are desperately needed. i was like a captain who decide to change the direction of the ship by shifting the sails from west to the east. i chased after whales and dolphins then got bored, and now i wanted to go hunt some treasures and fighting with pirates.
but i am not a captain of a ship. im a freaking student. a Business student for exact. an interesting course but it bored me with theories, numbers and craps. business should be more on applications i thought but the syllabus end up with theories here and there and its killing me. slowly. its like, im remembering all this theories only for the sake of tests and final exam. i dont even think that i will apply it when i go out and have a job.
i was thinking to switch my course to completely in a different area for the Degree. Art & Design or maybe Interior design. either one. i cannot thinking of other fields other than these artsy thingy. the only field that i am pretty great at. dont get me wrong. i never asked to be a deep creative artsy people whatsoever. in fact i always wanted to be a genius, impress my parents, and do wonders all the time. i wish i was great at calculus, periodic table, big bang theory, remembering nucleus parts, medula oblongata and stuff but it only happen in dreams. my brain cannot effectively proceed stuff with apparatus, formulas and theories but more on my hands and fingers, creating illustrations or crafts. other than that, my hands are only good at destroying and ruining stuff. i told ayah about taking AD for degree and he said he just support whatever my decision is. he even suggested me to take ID as it might offered better opportunities in job vacancies after i graduate. so now i have options to make.
may be i just missed the time when i took Visual Art as an additional subject during the SPM. i was a Science stream student who took art subject more as an escape. after the school hour finished, i stayed at bilik seni until 6 pm with my art teacher finishing the projects with few other students. and time flied so fast, i barely feel it. i was drowned in my own passion i guess. at the beginning it was hard because i have to sacrificed a lot of things especially in terms of time and money as it required quite expensive pens and materials. i almost gave up and wanted to quit but i cant because i was halfway there and i loved doing it. it actually kept me thinking of happy thoughts. although my SPM result was not really that great nor bad, and i was a little frustrated with the science and maths subjects but looking at my visual art result, was a little relieved. i got A1.
whether to keep chasing after dolphins and whales or get a little adventures by fighting with pirates and hunting some treasures, still, in a massive dilemma.
